When we think of marriage, we think of love, happiness, and harmony. And those things are certainly there, but every couple will have conflict at some point or another.
The truth is, even in a godly marriage, disagreement and struggle occur. But here’s something that people often forget:
God can take those conflicts and use them to make you stronger.
Let’s look at how?
1. Conflict Reveals What’s in Our Hearts
When everything is okay, it’s easy enough to appear patient, kind, or forgiving. Trouble, though, has a way of exposing what’s really in us. Maybe pride, insecurity, anger, or fear. God shows these things to us not only to shame us—but to heal us.
By struggle, God can show us where we need to develop spiritually. It’s like holding up a mirror to our heart. And when we see what really is there, we get a chance to bring it before Him for transformation.
2. It Teaches Us to Love Like Jesus
Love isn’t feelings—love is action. Loving your husband or wife even when marriage gets awkward is what teaches you to love like Jesus: unconditionally, patiently, and sacrificially.
Jesus loved us while we were sinners. That means that we don’t need to wait for the perfect time to love; we are instructed to love even in the messy times. Conflict can be a classroom where God teaches us on this deeper form of love.
3. It Fosters Humility and Dependence on God
Marriage conflicts remind us that we can’t fix everything on our own. They force us to our knees. That’s not so terrible—it’s sacred.
When you’re struggling to understand your spouse, or getting hurt, you may find yourself praying more, listening to God more, and trusting Him more deeply. By doing so, your marriage becomes stronger—and so does your relationship with God.
4. It Improves Communication and Trust
Believe it or not, even constructive conflict will strengthen your relationship. Faced and confronted with humility and honesty, conflict will more effectively teach you to listen, clarify more clearly your needs, and trust more deeply.
Even with God’s help, it is conceivable that you can practice living to communicate in the ways that bring peace rather than pain.
Conclusion: God Is Working, Even in the Struggle
If you’re going through conflict in your marriage right now, don’t lose heart. It doesn’t mean your relationship is broken beyond repair. In fact, it may be a sign that God is doing some important work in your life.
Invite Him into the middle of it. Ask Him, “Lord, what are you teaching me through this?” And when you do, you will be stunned at how He uses even the hard times to work in your life—both as a spouse and as His child.
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